PART ONE g – the Party

  Lightning is irritated. She's muttering under her breath. I caught something something "parade of assholes" something something. She stepped into her shoes, after throwing down one of the towels from the stack onto the cement and wiping her feet half dry before quickly cing her shoes up. She's still in her underwear, and she grabbed her shirt and dropped it over her boobs. I saw her pull her hair back and band the ponytail in. She's no doubt going to find someone to put a stop to this, before the kid gets hurt.

  Then, her demeanor changed. I watched her look at me, smile and wink. She walked slowly up to the kid. She's taller than him, by a couple inches. She kind of towers over the girl. I'm watching him. He's still smiling, all calm. I saw him crack his knuckles under the water. A thing he would do before putting his fighting gloves on with the boys. I watched him slowly crack his neck, once to each side. Another ritual before he would engage for a couple of minutes at a time doing pytime. He sighed. He's getting close to standing up, and making good on his promise.

  Lightning was… actually hitting on this kid? What the hell. She's smiling. Running her fingers down the front of his shirt. Little giggle hair flip, giggle hair flip.

  "You're kind of cute."

  "Yeah. You too, hun."

  "Thanks. You know what I do?"

  "No."

  "I? Py… soccer. You know what soccer is, right…"

  "Sure…"

  She's running her fingers down his shirt while she smiles and articutes every word quietly and carefully. One of her over the top flirt voices.

  "That means… I kick balls around. Kinda my thing… you know what your thing is? Hmm?"

  "No… what?"

  "Hmm. This…"

  That's when she got him. There's a lot of bad things in this world, but one of the worst would likely be getting kicked in the nuts. But then, you can top that. Getting kicked in the nuts by what for all intents and purposes is a professional soccer pyer, has to be far worse. She had him smiling, looking at her acting all girly, completely unawares in his drunken state… and used it to haul off and all but lift him up off his feet when the ft of the top of her tenner made solid contact with his groin.

  Her eyes instantly went from all sweet and innocent flirt to what I see when she streaks past me on the field. Intense, highly focused, hint of the determination that only a slightly crazy person truly has access to. He crumpled, making some "ah…" noise. She didn't pause to admire her attack at all, she went to work. She now had a completely helpless prone victim down, and was hauling off, putting her instep to his ribs with everything she had. Shoulders and hips swinging into it, as if she was driving a ball up field like I would to clear it.

  Everyone either froze, or didn't yet notice. He had gone white and silent but for air hissing out when she caught him full in the groin, and the thuds off of his ribs went easily under the music coming out of the basement. The few people that did notice, were either gawking or pointing and enjoying the show. These were the people already bemused, waiting for the show to start when he finally had enough and got out of the hot tub. The fact that Lightning had done it first, was a complete wild card in the situation.

  After several leaden shots to his ribs that rendered him completely harmless, his face was ying cheek on the cement. Conscious, but out of it. In shock and in pain. She stomped on his head once, hard. The girl finally got her senses going and moved to grab her, but that wasn't happening. She was taller and stronger and definitely in better shape than the little snotty kid she had put down. She just tossed the girl like a rag doll and gave him another shot in the ribs before the girl tried again to get her arm and hold her back.

  Lightning grabbed the little girl up by the shirt and spoke to her for the first time.

  "The fuck you think you're gonna do! I'll kick your teeth right outta your goddamn mouth! You, were doing it, too!"

  Then she tossed her back for space between them, and while she didn't kick her, she did sort of wave her foot right over the girls head and back down. Quick. The girl was drunk like the kid ying all but unconscious now. By the time she reacted and jerked back, stumbling and almost falling from it, the foot had already passed over her head and came back. Her eyes went big, and she took several steps back.

  This tall, suddenly crazy girl really could kick her teeth out of her mouth, and she realized that now. Passing the foot easily and quickly over her head told her she could easily reach any part of her she felt like. Lightning just went back to kicking the kid some more, before two of the guys from the drink table hooting and hollering realized that while this was entertaining as hell? If they cut this off before a trip to the emergency room was in order, the party wouldn't have to stop.

  He had gotten out of the hot tub, chuckling at Lightning's response to all this, and made no move to stop her. He slipped his boots on, then tossed his gray Military Police shirt on. He walked over and nicely enough said "I got this…"

  He got the kid up on his feet, mostly with no help from the kid himself. He was out of it. He just yanked him up by the shirt to a waving no sea legs sway. He dipped his right arm down through the kids legs, and came up while dropping an arm over his shoulder. The kid was now cargo across his shoulders. He humped him like a military pack. He stepped over to the guys at the drink table calming Little Lightning down.

  "Guys? That end's where the dumpster is, right…"

  One nodded, and the other smiled.

  "Just taking out the trash. Be right back…"

  This took him past the girl standing there dumbfounded at what happened to the guy she came with.

  "Little dy? You, come with me."

  She stood rooted for a few seconds, then scurried to follow and see what became of the guy. I walked over to follow the surprisingly calm proceedings. He lifted the thick pstic lid of the dumpster, and unceremoniously looked in quick, then dropped the kid in and closed the lid. He wiped his hands dramatically, and calmly addressed the girl. Once again, in that quiet sing song tone.

  "Little dy. I tried to tell you guys. You wouldn't listen. Maybe now you'll take my advice. Just go."

  "But…"

  She pointed, mumbling. The dumpster.

  "Yeah. He can get himself out. You? Can help him out. Or? Go get a couple of your drunken assholes down that house, to come fish him out the garbage bin. I don't give a shit. I tried to be nice, let you go."

  She puckered up.

  "Aw, boo hoo. I hope you're not stupid enough to bring some of those other drunk little kids up here. But then again? You just might be that dumb. That? Was the little girlfriend in the hot tub. This one? That's the big girlfriend. You don't wanna piss her off, trust me on that one. If you bring a couple of those assholes up here, and do anything but get this piece of shit out the garbage bin? Any of you set so much as one foot near that party? I swear to god, I'm going to put you all in this same dumpster. By myself."

  He leaned down and whispered in her face.

  "Go ahead. I dare you. And fuck you too, you little cunt. You were running your mouth too. Thought you were hot shit. He? Can't handle the little girlfriend. Go on, run your mouth to this one, see what she does."

  She puckered up more.

  "Now. Try to use that little pea brain, and imagine what I'm going to do, if you bring a couple of those assholes up here and try anything. Now. If you fuckers need my services? You know where I'm at. I'm going back, I'm getting back in that hot tub. With both my girlfriends again, and I'm going back to enjoying myself. Do not… make me… get out… of the hot tub… again. Get this ass goblin out of here, or let him sleep in there, I don't really care. Or? Just go flush some more tampons down the goddamn commode, that's about all you're really good for. Not my fucking problem anymore. Good night. I look forward? To never seeing you again."

  He was done, and walked easily back to the hot tub. He exchanged a few polite jokes to the guys at the drinks table. I could tell though, he was slyly fishing to see if anyone knew them, or were concerned. No one seemed to be, no one could even identify them. Lida came out to see what had gone on, the kid was in the dumpster and Wiz was back before she even made it out. Everyone seemed like floor show was over, no one died, cops didn't need called.

  Someone spoke up, and procimed firmly but not yelling… that if the cops did end up here? No one knew what they were even talking about. Must have been some other party. The music went back on. Ping pong noises came back. Normal party talk and ughter returned.

  "Schnapps on the rocks, right dies? Let's try this again."

  We both agreed.

  Little Lightning, did another little striptease, and went back into the hot tub again. I got undressed again, and went in another time. Me and him sat next to one another, and Light stood and pointed at which side she was still permitted to sit at. She ended up again on his other arm to the one I had. He put him arm first around me, then around Light, and we sipped our drinks. Eventually, Light rolled another but smaller joint than the first, when everyone was sure the cops weren't coming. They never did show up.

  Some guy asked about the scratches and bite marks. The guy standing next to him, perhaps a witness to the answers they got, who knows. Anyways, that guy asked what the marks up and down his legs were. My heel marks, ha. Lightning was hanging on his other arm. She cimed, while smiling sweetly, that me and her both were responsible for it. When he asked how that worked out, Light said I was Monday Wednesday Friday, she was Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday. When he asked what Sunday was, she rolled her eyes and sipped her schnapps. Then procimed Sunday was kind of a tag team, free for all sort of affair.

  Everyone knows he's my boyfriend, they kind of both swiveled their heads over to me. My reputation isn't Lightning's reputation, we're por opposites. She's a slut, I'm more of a nun that just escaped the convent. The one guy gnced down at my denim miniskirt and cropped T shirt ying there though, then they both looked at me in the tub. Wow, it shot through my mind that tonight really had been opposites night.

  Little lightning? Was dressed more conservatively. That was usually me. Tonight? I had the hooker clothes on. The nun was on my boyfriend's one arm, the slut on the other. The nun was dressed as a slut, and while the slut wasn't exactly dressed like a nun? By Little Lightning's normal standards, she kind of was.

  They're kind of looking the entire situation over. I shrugged.

  "See my boots?"

  They gnced down, then nodded.

  "He wasn't fucking me hard enough. So? I put the heels to him, to get it out of him. He's lucky I didn't have my riding spurs on."

  Lightning giggled, it didn't take her any encouragement to act up and py along.

  "I bit him, because he was fucking me too hard. But I can't cim all the scratches, though."

  They know us, the one guy quipped wise.

  "Lightning got fucked too hard? That's a new one for me to hear."

  Lightning bent over the edge of the hot tub, to stretch way out and rest her drink cup on the cement. Then sat up at this new height. Hell, it gave her an excuse to put her tits on dispy. She held her hands apart a certain width, made a circur okay sign with her one hand, went back to the opening and closing of her hand's width apart again. The hell was she doing, anyways? I had no idea. Then she held her hands apart steady.

  "Like I said. I got fucked? Too hard. I bit him, to slow him down some. It hurt. It… kinda worked, so, its all good. I'm flexible that way."

  They didn't say anything, I'm hiding my face in my hand. He ughed and raised his hands in the air and walked back to the drinks table and his buddies, chuckling. They both did. Then, the one guy circled back.

  "Hey, Toot. How you been. You having fun? Sorry about that earlier. Damned kids get drunk, hear about the infamous Vilge crawls… it happens. No big thing, nothing to worry about."

  "Hey, thanks. I mean, I'm kinda embarrassed. I had to have a girl fight my battles for me. Man, I'm never going to hear the end of this, from my Army buddies. Aw, when I meet the boys at the gym Monday? Christ."

  They were both chuckling.

  "So, Toot. If you got a minute. I hate you bug you…"

  "No. I remember you. Nice guy. Taylor, right? Lemme see here. You were a sophomore, makes you a junior coming up. Football, elementary education major. I remember we did… algebra I, then algebra II. You did okay. How's my memory doing here."

  "Oh, fine. Tyler, not Taylor. Same thing though."

  My bad. Tyler. What was your nickname again? Names, I'm bad with. Now faces, nicknames? That's me."

  "They call me Styles…"

  "Oh yeah, the funny story, about the nice suits…"

  "Yeah, that's me. Styles."

  "Okay. What you need?"

  "I'm starting my third year. I'm almost enough credits to technically be a Junior, but…"

  "Ah. Same thing. What though…"

  "One word. I'll run it by you. Geometry."

  "Okay. Which Geometry."

  "Just… Geometry. Not advanced Geometry."

  "Oh. Well, which professor you got? Geometry, is usually Dr. Weinstein and Dr. Berger, they split it up. Lots of majors need to take it. Thing is, Geometry is funny. It can be taught two ways. By proof, or by algebraic. Weinstein? Does proof. Berger does algebraic. You do proof with Weinstein? Its all by proof, then you do the algebraic at the end of every section. You go Berger? Its the opposite. Everything is by inspection, by algebraic solution. Then at the end of every section, they show the formal proof. Its like going around the block clockwise or counter clockwise. You end up at the same destination, but, its a different way there."

  "Yeah. Coach wanted me to ask you early on this one. I was wondering if you could… make sure I'm on your list. If you fill up."

  "No, no. Gentleman's agreement. Between the Math Lab, and the coaches. The administration? Wants happy coaches. Now Doc, that runs my Mathematics b? He wants to make the administration happy. That's his job. Which means Doc wants to make the coaches happy. Pyers, want happy coaches. Administration, wants happy coaches. I want a happy Doc I work for. So… I try to make the pyers happy. Everybody, makes everybody else happy. And happy pyers? Score more touchdowns. Which makes the coaches happier, which makes the administration happier, which gets Doc little gold stars, and then he's happy. And when Doc's happy, the tutors are all happy… and happy tutors? Make happy pyers. One, big, circle of happiness."

  "Right…"

  "On the record? First come, first served. Off the record? Scheduling conflict. Tutors switch students. Put my name on the bottom of the sheet you fill out, real light, in pencil. Wiz. That invokes the happy program. You're on the list."

  "Great. Now… about the… Weinstein, Berger controversy…"

  "Hmm. My memory's telling me… you worked with your, dad growing up… construction… actually id block for a summer, before you decided to take the football schorship."

  "My uncle, but yeah."

  "I remember the story, where you're ying block, apprentice. Doing great. Making good money. The older guy you worked with, he was expining its all good now? But… he had his shoulder operated on, happens to all of you. He made journeyman. How you can test into journeyman, or get it on years. But… he can't pass the test to become a Master Mason, and run jobs. And they won't let you become a Master Mason, no way no how, without that test. Years can't get it. Building might fall down. Its important, lives are on the line. And so… you suddenly thought about your shoulder, and? That a college degree wouldn't hurt you any either, because you'd probably be able to ace those Journeyman and Master tests, if you were a college boy. Am I remembering that right, Styles?"

  "Yeah. My dad thought me getting a degree was a good idea, and football pays for it… and if I just happened to learn a few things to let me test up, quick to become a young Master Mason? Oh boy… can I make some serious money. Setting up big jobs for my Uncle's company… all the Apprentices and Journeymen, filling in between my corners I set up and pass inspection. My shoulder? Much happier. My bank account? Much happier. I'm sure I have a happier wife and a happier house, too."

  "See Styles? You got your own… happy program going. You just pass Geometry and Trigonometry? With a D minus, I don't care… you'll be the whiz kid that can calcute angles, shoot those transit lines, be able to speak the engineer's nguage discussing the blueprints… and you won't be faking it. The engineers? Will request that… college boy, be on their job site."

  "Well. Back to the Berger or Weinstein controversy…"

  "My crystal ball says… you want Dr. Berger. Solving geometrical applications by inspection, then by algebraic methods? To set up the proof. That's hands on. You first draw the lines and angles, carefully. You measure with a protractor. You plug the numbers into some short, easy equations, on a calcutor. We can program your calcutor, that you're not only allowed to have, but must have? You just memorize the order, the exact order you enter the numbers into it? It spits out the answer for you. You have to memorize the ws and proofs and the little equations? But… there's some dirty poems to remember that stuff."

  "You make it sound easy."

  "Its not impossible. Now, technically. I'm allowed to help you program your expensive calcutor, and you're going to buy the real expensive one. The one with the big screen on it. Costs a few bucks. It'll pay off big time, when you can just read English words, next to the numbers. I can hide the equations and definitions in the calcutor, too. If? You buy the real expensive one. Your professor? Will not know you have that in it. I know how to hide it, with a password. You see, you get the right expensive calcutor? I can wipe the calcutor clean, download a modified system for it, and install it. My computer buddies showed me that trick."

  "Ha. Great…"

  "Like I said. I'm not allowed to program the calcutor for you, I'm supposed to help you, and you do it. Fine line, though. Between helping someone… doing it for them… one of those things. You raise your right hand to god, and swear I helped you, and didn't just do it for you. And Styles?"

  "Yeah."

  "Your professor knows about the calcutor trick. But…"

  "But what…"

  "We're going to buy another almost as expensive calcutor. We're going to take the cases off, and switch cases. So, when he looks at the calcutor…"

  "He sees the legal one, not the illegal one."

  "Right… and the thing me and the computer geeks download and reinstall on the one we end up with? It changes the screen when you turn it on, so it says its…"

  "Oh, the legal one. I get it."

  "And Styles?"

  "Yeah, Toot."

  "Naturally, we never had this conversation. I know of no such operation, as operation re calcution… nor if I did, would I be at liberty to ever discuss such an operation. If it even existed. Which of course it doesn't."

  "Oh. Naturally."

  "And… you can sell your calcutor, for a lot more than you paid for it? To some freshman football pyer you trust, taking the same csses you take. For a small fee, I set them up with everything you need for each css, every semester. In the end? Everybody? Just happy, happy, happy."

  "I like happy. Which brings up… what if my schedule has… Dr. Weinstein on it…"

  "Oh. Pyers on schorship? Could never, ever get any kind of special treatment, to pass their schostic courses, to keep them pying. That would viote the NCAA rule book. A btant viotion. We could never have that, Styles. But… if I were to have lunch with my Doctor, that runs the Mathematics Lab. If he happened to have lunch with… some administrator he likes to have lunch with? Who knows. Its a schedule. Its some words on a piece of paper, that the computer just prints out. You get schedule corrections in the mail sometimes. Some kid working in the scheduling office, I'm sure he just tapped the wrong keys that day, he was in a rush to get to lunch. Hey, it happens."

  "Oh god, thanks."

  "Don't mention it. Because it never happened."

  "Oh, right, right. We're good. So… speaking of the… happy program, Toot. You, finally got on your own little happy program, it looks like."

  "What do you mean?"

  "You're dating Hurry. You seem to be living in the Vilge now. And tonight? You look… pretty happy."

  "Ah. My birthday came not too long ago. Its just been a great week."

  "I can see that. Hurry? I see you have a new… wardrobe consultant. You look very pretty tonight. No offense."

  "None taken. And thank you. Lightning helped me pick something out, for Wiz's birthday."

  "I see. Toot? Thanks. Anything you ever need I can help with, just ask."

  "You doing okay in your education csses?"

  "Yeah. God help me, its all multiple choice, except for the math csses. You show up to css every day, you read the pages every night, its fine."

  "Good. Keep your education grades up. You just need to pass the math csses. D in a math css here and there, doesn't matter… its the average GPA that counts. You only need to hold a 2.5, you were what, 2.7… 2.8? Something like that."

  "Um, actually? Almost a 2.9. More is better. Which brings up something else…"

  "Hmm?"

  "My dad, my uncle. They're happy. My dad and my uncle are in fact so happy right now? That… if I can hit 3.0 and hold it a whole semester… they said on account of football paying for all this, it would be no problem to pitch in and get me a new car, which… I mean, come on, who wouldn't want a new car, you know."

  "Concentrate on your multiple choice education tests. Just read the chapters over and over, let the words in big print soak in. My advice, is not so much to try to memorize everything, but just keep reading the same chapters over and over. Come into the b, we'll take an hour and go over your schedule before you make it. Space things out, so there's only one D a semester, and the other good grades average it right out. We all have to take electives, out of our major. We'll try to cherry pick those electives. Good way to sp easy A's in there. An average? Is a funny thing that way."

  "I didn't know I could go to the math b, for scheduling."

  "You can. I'll just fill in the bnks on my form, that you're preparing for a math css next semester that you're nervous about. Then, what we do that hour? Nobody's business but our own. I mean, technically you are preparing for another math css, more or less."

  "Wow. Toot? You're great. Why is there only one of you, down there? We need, like, two or three more of you."

  "Aw, Styles. I appreciate a compliment and all, but… I'm just a tutor, bud. If I got a knack for expining things, then fine. What I think it is, is that there's more guys out there, who're just like me. Or better at it than me. But we'll never know. Most geeks like me? Aren't interested in helping other students. You know what the biggest crime to me is?"

  "What."

  "A lot of you… jocks? You guys ain't dumb. No, to me, the biggest crime, by far. Is that someone started this bullshit, that tough guys, and smart guys, are different guys. Some are, some aren't. It goes both ways, too. I'm friends with tons of… spastic geeks, just like me. I think plenty of them, would have been just fine at some sport. They could be plenty tough. But… someone convinced them, they can't do that. Because they're smart. Same way someone, somewhere, convinced you. That you should concentrate on football, instead of… something else, something you might have enjoyed and gotten good at. I've been in both worlds, Styles. And I'm telling you. The best warriors? Py chess. The best chess pyers? Know how to fight."

  "Hmm. That would be my dad, Toot. Construction worker. Said if I had time to sit around reading a book in the summer? I had time to learn how to do something useful. Started taking me to construction sites. So I could learn about… good paying jobs. The trades."

  "And your uncle? What does he want. The dad's brother, that now owns a construction company."

  "Oh. Yeah. He wants a Master Mason. In the family. Turns out, you need more than a little math, to pass."

  "Styles? You could have had Geometry and Trigonometry, in high school."

  "I did construction with my dad, so… I went to Vocational Tech. Brickying. Couldn't take those csses."

  "Which is ironic, because the brickyers? Could really use some guys that passed Geometry and Trig. And they wonder why they can't get them, and the course is weeding those guys out. Styles, you know how if you want a good football pyer, you gotta get em young?"

  "Yeah. My sport. I was decent at it."

  "Math, and… other csses. Simir thing. I was allowed to be a geek when I was little. My dad didn't take the book off me. He bought me more."

  "Well. Your dad was some kind of… scientist, or professor or something, I bet. My dad and his brother? Construction workers."

  "My dad worked his whole life in a steel mill. He said if I really wanted to work in a factory or a mill, like him and a lot of other dads did? I could try that when I was older. But, that the time to get ready to do really good at college? Was all through school, so I was ready."

  "Toot? Never saw you with your shirt off before. Of course, football pyers? We have our own private gym, at the stadium. So I wouldn't have ran across you, in the campus public gym. You look like you pyed sports. Just saying."

  "When I was little? Some parents make you py every sport there is. Take music lessons. You know, keep the kid out of trouble kinda thing."

  "Yeah."

  "As I started growing up? One by one. I got weeded out of those sports. Teachers? Well… like your coach encouraged you to keep working at football? Teachers… encouraged me to… take more csses. In the end, I was a spastic geek, and I was good at it. All I had left? Was I was a track star. I pyed high school soccer, but… my ass warmed the bench. I was a scrub pyer. My girlfriend, can kick my ass at soccer. Hell, why lie. Both of these girls can."

  "Track, huh. Skinny guys. But… I know you were in the service, you hang out with the Army guys. I see your T shirt. Military Police. Now I can put it all together. You were a cop in the military. GI bill."

  "No, Styles. I lived and trained with the MP's. For something to do. I was a computer programmer in the service. Spastic geek there, too. I just learned how to be an MP with my buddies."

  "Toot? You're a life saver. My coach loves you. You're great. You ever need anything? Just ask. A big football program like this? Can't afford to lose a few pyers, for failing out. Coach jokes that you should get a jersey."

  "That's funny you should say that, Styles."

  "Why?"

  "I have a complete Military Police uniform. I never wear it, but for Halloween. Hell, not a good way to score a sack of weed, dressed like a cop, you know? But… I used to help train the new guys, and it wasn't even my job."

  "I know one of the guys used to haze you, when he saw you at parties. Coach found out about that? He shit a nuclear bomb. He's scared of losing pyers, it happens. Every coach's worst nightmare. You're like family, brother. Don't ever hesitate to ask. Hell, if you're ever on skid row after college is over? Before you nd a career job, it happens. Look me up. Anyone can do bor gang work, till you nd your career job you want. Its a union card. You could go anywhere, and automatically nd a good paying job, till you find what you want. Wanna move to some city? Or in the country? Just head for the local union hall. Sign up. Not hard. Its just hard to get signed in. That? I got you covered."

  "All right. Stop down the math b. Bring your phone. I'll take you shopping, for a couple calcutors."

  "I'll be down. All right, I'm taking you away from your fun time. I'd say have fun with the girls, but, uh… you seem to have that covered. Oh yeah. The kid? Dumpster boy."

  "Oh. Sorry abut that."

  "No. Its fine. They came and dug him out the dumpster, and they took off. Been a while now. If the cops were coming? They would of been here by now. Have fun. No worries. Its all good."

  I scratched the hair on his chest.

  "Well, Wiz. You're making friends."

  "I'm a tutor. I'm providing a service. If I'm good at my job, and the… jock program here appreciates it? Then everybody's happy."

  "You happy, Wiz? Today. Here. Now."

  "Yeah. Sure. Hell, I'm sitting in a hot tub. I got a beautiful calendar girl on each arm. Boobies out and everything. Life? Couldn't be better tonight. I'd love to send a cell phone pic of this, to my MP buddies. How about you, Hurry. You happy too?"

  "Yeah. I am. My csses are okay. I have a boyfriend I like. How about you, Lightning. Now that you kicked the asshole out the parade, you feeling better? You happy too."

  "Oh. I'm okay. I could be happier. But, we can't be happy every day. Tonight? Just not my night. Pooh."

  "You don't have to stay here in the tub with us, honey. You can mingle. Go… shopping if you want. You're at the boy store."

  "Yeah. Great. Does me a lot of good. I had a nice boyfriend, and I actually liked him. Hurry, those two things don't usually go together. I don't even feel like I did anything wrong. I'm being punished, for being good. Its definitely not fair."

  "Well welcome to my world. You don't get fun and prizes, every single day of your life, for being good."

  "Oh. Listen to you. Who helped you, when you asked. And, I might add, miss high and mighty. Who is being… not so nice, and enjoying it."

  "Okay, Light. I apologize. That wasn't fair. Little Lightning here, was my… tutor, I guess."

  "Why do I feel like, she didn't help you with your Geometry css."

  Lightning snorted, but smiled to let me know it was in good fun.

  "More like… Human Retions."

  "Hurry? How much help did… Little Miss Two Feet, actually give you."

  "Wizzy. No intimate details. But… you followed our little Hurricane home with a smile on your face, didn't you."

  "Oh. Yeah, I did. Definitely."

  "The pn for her to meet you? All her. No lie there. But… from the moment you asked her out. Well, you know how people make a living, pnning parties?"

  "Yeah."

  "That, was me. It took a couple weeks for three dates, and she wanted your third date to be… special. I gave her my entire py book, over a couple weeks."

  "For which you were not working for free, I might add."

  Lightning stuck her tongue out at me and ughed.

  "I got pizza. Whatever I wanted cooked for me. Hey, I was giving up going out, for a couple weeks. To help my big sister out. I owed her. You enjoyed it, right Wizzy?"

  "Very much."

  "Hmm. I bet I can list the activities, that went on."

  "I don't know about that, Lightning."

  Lightning imitated the old time girl in the movies voice.

  "Oh my. I need a big, strong man. To just take me, right now. Bend me over my car, right away. I just can't take it any more. Make me like it. Make me…"

  I palmed my face, giggling, embarrassed in a fun way.

  "I had one boyfriend at college, before you. Two guys in two years. I had a couple boyfriends in high school. Not a lot, nothing super serious. I found you, I wanted you… I wanted to make sure I came home from that date weekend, with my boyfriend, bagged and tagged. Um… my grandma? Would say that Little Lightning was very… worldly, that way. She gave me a few pointers."

  "More like my whole py book."

  "Okay. Light coached me, on her… whole py book."

  "Hurry? Just admit it. You actually like being bad. It feels good."

  I sighed.

  "Yeah."