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Already happened story > Living Inside the Protagonist’s Head > Chapter 17 [Arc I : The Shadow]

Chapter 17 [Arc I : The Shadow]

  Mariane was sitting on a wooden bench, in front of the academy, her face contorted in a furious pout.

  ‘Nothing is going my way ! After the failed attack on Thomas, every prince’s intimacy gauge went down by 10%, it took forever to bring it back up ! And I can’t even go out of the academy to go on dates in the city, it sucks so much !’

  She kicked a pebble and grumbled while looking at her phone, when she heard the voice of a man. It was one of the students, chatting cheerfully with his friends.

  “Did you see the rumored scary man at the castle ?”

  “Yeah, I heard he’s the confidant of the king, or something like that. He always has an angry face, and his bck eyes are so terrifying !”

  “Oh, you think he’s scary because you only saw him in public ! Last week I had to pick up a document at the castle, and you will never guess what I saw out the window ! The king and him were in the garden, and they were so sweet with each other, holding hands and smiling. It was really cute !”

  “Really ? Are they lovers, then ?”

  “But I don’t understand why he’s not hiding his horns and wings. Is he a newborn ? In that case, maybe he’s the king’s son, not his lover.”

  “No, I heard from a friend working at the castle that he is sick. Apparently, if you walk near his room at mealtime, you can hear him puking.”

  “Poor guy, no wonder he can’t control his magic… Was he hit by a curse ?”

  “Yeah, how else would he be sick ?”

  “But I thought the king liked the human girl ! I mean, during the whole fiasco with the princes, people saw the girl in the king’s arms.”

  “That’s the juicy part ! Apparently, the guy was trapped in the girl’s body and the princes wanted to destroy his soul !”

  “Killing the king’s lover ? What the fuck ? Are they even sane ?”

  One of the men hit his friend in the ribs, pointing to Mariane who was gring at them. The group quickly scattered with an awkward smile, but the girl was fuming.

  ‘What the fuck are they talking about ? I thought that Thomas was conspiring with Bael to oust me, but were they in love ? Thomas, the anxious virgin who panics with a kiss ? No, they must be mistaken, it’s impossible. But what is pissing me off so much is that he is a demon ! How in Hell is it possible that he has powers that even I don’t have ? Hey, shitty game, aren’t I supposed to be the chosen one ? This whole universe exists for me, so why is everything going wrong ?’

  As if responding to her whining, a pink game screen-like window appeared in front of her eyes.

  [Do you want a tip ? ‘My Heart goes THUMP when I look at you !’ can help ?

  Cost : 10% intimacy with a random target ! (Doesn’t apply to love interests with more than 50% intimacy)]

  Mariane didn’t even need to think. All the princes had more than 50% intimacy, and the only other targets were Bael and Baam, both of which already hated her. Taking out 10% intimacy wouldn’t make a big difference.

  ‘I accept, give me the tip !’

  The window changed, and a paragraph of text appeared. Mariane read and silence, and a smile crept on her lips.

  ‘A mage stone, huh ? So, if I’m a mage, it will hurt a lot ? Nobody checked if I had any mana, they just assumed I was a normal human, but what would happen if I suddenly fainted while touching the stone ? That would be an interesting event.’

  She checked the little map provided by the game. The stone just so happened to be kept in the academy. It wouldn’t be long until she could execute that small pn of hers.

  ***

  “You lied to me, you didn’t eat.”

  Bael was looking at Thomas with his brows furrowed, and the bck haired man had his head lowered, avoiding his gaze.

  “I’m sorry…”

  The king sighed.

  “Don’t apologize, I’m not mad at you ! It’s not your fault, you can’t force yourself if it hurts. I’m just angry at myself because I can’t find any solution. I don’t know what to do, it’s my first time taking care of someone…”

  He rubbed his eyes, looking tired and sad. Thomas was biting his lips. The st thing he wanted was to be a weight on Bael’s shoulders, but he didn’t seem to be able to do anything right. Not knowing what to do, he repeated :

  “I’m sorry…”

  Bael flinched and cupped Thomas’ head in his gloved hands, forcing him to look in his eyes.

  “Stop apologizing. I told you, it’s not your fault. And you aren’t bothering me either. We aren’t at war anymore, Hell is at peace, and demons live for long, so changes are slow. It means that I literally have nothing important to do, except enriching the study program for the academy and punishing mischief. All of that can also be done by someone else, I take care of it because I’m bored. So, if you need me, I can give those tasks to other people and take care of you. It won’t make me worse of a king, it won’t impact my life, if anything I will be happier because I will get to spend more time with you.”

  The bck haired man could see that Bael was sincere, his speech contained no lies. He really didn’t see him as a burden and was happy to spend his days with him. He didn’t know why, but Thomas suddenly felt a ball in his throat.

  “Oh no, I didn’t mean to make you cry ! What is wrong ? Did I say something bad ?”

  Bael was panicking, wiping away the tears that were running down Thomas’ cheeks.

  “No, it’s not you… I don’t know what’s happening to me either…”

  Thomas closed his eyes, trying to stop the tears, but it didn’t work.

  “I want to get better too. I want to go out, visit this kingdom that you like so much, I want to control my magic and feel safe on my own, but I just can’t do it. Nothing is working…”

  Bael listened to Thomas while stroking his hair, and whispered in a soft voice.

  “You will be able to do it. You just need time. Maybe I pressured you too much. We’ll take it slow.”

  The slim man grabbed the king’s hand and put it on his cheek, burying his face in it. Somehow, it made him feel better, but the fabric of the glove was irritating his skin.

  “Can you take it off ?”

  Bael widened his eyes.

  “Are you sure ? Don’t push yourself too much !”

  “No, it’s alright.”

  With shaky hands, the king took out his gloves and extended his hands towards Thomas. Without hesitating a second, the man took Bael’s hands and put them on his cheeks, closing his eyes. It was a new sensation, maybe a bit scary, but the warmth felt so good that the ball in his throat seemed to melt instantly.

  “Are you okay ?”

  Thomas emitted a long sigh of relief, as if his anxiousness was leaving his body through his breath.

  “It feels good…”

  Bael reddened vividly but didn’t move, in fear of ruining the moment.

  “I’m gd…”

  They stayed that way for a moment, and then Thomas opened his eyes again, still holding onto Bael’s hands.

  “I think you don’t have to wear gloves anymore.”

  The king bit the inside of his cheeks to contain his joy, nodding slowly.

  “Even while holding hands ?”

  “Yes.”

  “All the time ? Not just when you ask to ?”

  “Yes, just throw them away.”

  Thomas was amused by the smile creeping on Bael’s lips. The issue of food and sleep wasn’t resolved, but it was still a huge improvement. As if proving his words, Thomas took a step forward, and leaned against the king, burying his face in his neck.

  “I think I’m alright now.”

  Bael was confused at first, but quickly gained back his senses and held Thomas tightly, hugging him while stroking his hair.

  “I’m gd. Fuck, I’m so gd… I think it’s the best day of my life ! Fuck ! Sorry, I keep swearing…”

  Thomas ughed and put his arms around the king, hugging him back.

  “It’s okay. I like when you swear.”

  It was their first real hug, not in a moment of fear and sorrow, but simply because they wanted to be close to each other. Bael was so happy that his heart could explode.

  ‘Fuck, I like him so much… I want to kiss him right now. I can’t, I shouldn’t. But fuck, I want to so bad…’

  If Thomas knew his true feelings, he surely would be scared. So Bael kept quiet and held him tighter. They finally separated when someone knocked on the door.

  -Knock Knock

  “Dinner is served, young master.”

  The king inwardly cursed his aide, but didn’t show it. Instead, he turned to Thomas.

  “Do you feel like eating right now ?”

  The slim man nodded.

  “I can try.”

  Bael opened the door and took the food cart from Baam. Seeing his pouting face, the green haired demon smiled and whispered.

  “Did I interrupt something ?”

  “Don’t ask if you know !”

  The aide giggled softly and leaned towards the king.

  “If he can’t eat alone, how about trying to feed him ?”

  Bael almost snapped at him, but stopped. It was not a bad idea. He had never tried to feed Thomas before, and the atmosphere was just right. He smiled and addressed a discreet thumbs up to Baam, who ughed softly again and closed the door. The king took the food cart to the tea table where Thomas was already seated. The slim man tried to take a fork, but Bael stopped him.

  “Let me feed you this time.”

  Thomas’ eyes widened.

  “I can eat alone !”

  “I know, but we haven’t tried this yet, maybe it can help.”

  He really wanted to protest, but Thomas couldn’t refute Bael’s words. It was true that eating with him was easier than eating alone, so being fed surely would have positive results.

  He gave up and nodded, looking at the king’s happy face.

  “You look like you’re enjoying this very much. I’ll start to think you have ulterior motives.”

  Bael took the first dish and cut a piece, picking it up with the fork and holding it to Thomas’ lips.

  “I always have ulterior motives with you.”

  “If you say so.”

  The slim man opened his mouth and ate the piece. It was a strange bnd meat that tasted like nothing. But curiously, it wasn’t unpleasant.

  “I like this. What is it ?”

  Bael’s face beamed into a sincere smile.

  “The same thing you couldn’t eat yesterday.”

  Thomas widened his eyes in disbelief.

  “You’re joking.”

  “Nope, it’s the same dish. Looks like you can eat it when I feed you !”

  The king took out his phone and called someone.

  “Baam, clear my schedule for the next few days, especially at meal time.”

  He winked at the shocked Thomas.

  “Looks like I have a new task.”