PART ONE k – the Party

  "Hurry, really. You're serious."

  "Yeah. I can't hold him down and tickle him. I need… a helper."

  "I'm in, this is very bad, but… I'm not sure me and you can hold him down, hun. Don't kid yourself."

  "I'm not stupid. That's why I'm asking for your help. How much naughty fun like this, you ever had a with a boy. Surely…"

  She giggled.

  "I mean, I own a pair of handcuffs. They usually go on me, but… once or twice? Went on the boy some."

  "You own handcuffs?"

  "Duh. Hello. Bad girl? Right here. Wanna know the first rule of bad girl school?"

  "Afraid to ask."

  "If you don't do it? Another girl will. Boy wants a hummer? You hum. Guy wants to… whatever. Then that's what you do. If its something too out there for you? You just get a different boy."

  "Well, I guess handcuffs work."

  "I have two pair."

  "What?"

  "Bought a nice pair. First boy asked for that? Whatever. Got drunk a different time. Thought I was grabbing mine on the way out, ended up with another pair. Doesn't do us much good, though."

  "How do they not work. Its what the damn things are for, right?"

  "Hurry? Usually, they go on me. Yeah, a boy can sp them on me. But the other way? They have to want that. Right, and all her stupid girl power csses? Girl cops are not the same thing as guy cops. Girl cops can't even barely sp the cuffs on the suspect, without holding a gun to their head. Look on the internet. Now. That's some drunken asshole. That guy, there? Hello? Military Police. We'll both end up in handcuffs, getting tickled. Hmm… of course? That, sounds like fun too… I'm in."

  "Light, you're not bad. You're rotten."

  "Fttery? Thanks. Good girls may get to heaven, but… bad girls? Go everywhere."

  "You act like I can't get the damn things on him. I'll sweet talk him into anything."

  "Then we tickle the shit out of him, right?"

  "Oh yeah."

  "Fun, that only a bad girl could enjoy."

  "Yeah. I wanna teach him a lesson. And… have bad girl fun, at the same time. Light?"

  "Hmm."

  "You bought the pair of cuffs, for you?"

  "Sure. Standard bad girl item, really. Bunch of girls have them."

  "You said they were usually for you. But, if a guy asks…"

  "Yeah. Here and there? They ask for it. The guys that do? They like it. I was surprised."

  "What did you do after that?"

  She shrugged.

  "I didn't know what to do. So, I just did to him, what the other guys did to me. When I was in them. No biggie."

  "What… do the guys usually do, when you wear them. Or do I wanna even know this…"

  "Ah. They wanna put it in my bum. That's all. Like I wouldn't do it anyways, pffft. Lost my butt cherry in junior high school."

  "So, you…"

  "Look. Handcuffs came up. Hey, I got a pair. Bring em over next time. Hey, great, that'll be fun. So? I brought over a big bottle of champagne, and had a pair of handcuffs. You know, couple drinks, before… to rex, you know how it is."

  "So, how did… I mean, if you're rexing, for…"

  "Well, that's what I figured. Then, after a few gsses of champagne, he holds his wrists out. Oh. Remember, rule number one, of being a bad girl. You won't do it? There's some other girl who will. So… put them suckers on him, and finished that bottle of champagne, and…"

  "Oh Christ. That? Was champagne boy."

  "Yeah…"

  "Hmm."

  "You got the picture now?"

  "Yeah. Thanks for the image."

  "Anytime… oh?"

  "Yeah, Light."

  "You said he tickled you too much. Got that. What was… you were being made to promise naughty fun…?"

  "Oh, that."

  "Well?"

  I acted all embarrassed.

  "Uh, you know. Bum?"

  "Oh, I get it. He had to make you, gotcha. Just ended up a little rougher than you pnned, eh?"

  "Yeah."

  "Eh. That happens. You act like every guy was the same once I wore the bracelets… some are nicer, some are rougher. All the same thing though. Your bum got it a little harder than you pnned on, you're saying."

  "Uh huh."

  "Well…?"

  "Well, what."

  "I dunno. We're already teaching him a lesson, might as well teach him that lesson too. Its not like I don't still have the champagne bottle."

  "Yuck."

  "Oh. I ran it through the dishwasher. Twice. Kind of a… souvenir. I use it, as a kind of a… be good story."

  "Huh?"

  "You know. The champagne story? You better be a little bit nice when you're back there, or you'll be the next champagne boy. They get the drift. Now. You said, he wasn't nice back there, right?"

  "I wouldn't call it… nice."

  "Lesson number two then. Fucking go for it. Have fun."

  "How do I talk him into that…"

  "Oh. Bad boys don't ask, they just… do. I mean, you know that much, right? Its the whole point, you know."

  "Okay…"

  "Well. Once the guy wanted the cuffs on him? Shit, what do I do now. Bad boys don't ask, they just do… so? I'm the bad girl now, I just… did."

  "He… didn't ask for… champagne?"

  "Duh."

  "That's… rape."

  "Another big duh."

  "The coach…"

  "What. Only girls get raped. When's the st time you ever once heard about a guy getting raped, let alone seen it. Get real, Hurry. What's he going to do, go to the cops? They'll ask for our phone number…"

  I feigned indignation, and mild outrage.

  "Anything else you wanna tack on? While we're having fun?"

  "Well. I was thinking… it was his birthday. Birthday swats. He's twenty four. One to grow on? Twenty five."

  "Okay…"

  She sipped her drink.

  "Just like that?"

  "Yeah. Why."

  "We're gonna cuff him, tickle him. Champagne him, swat him…"

  "And?"

  "Little much, don't you think?"

  "All that stuff? Goes on all the time. Christ Hurry. Articles in girl magazines all the time. Have spicy fun, spice up your love life. Everyone does it. We'll just do it all in one night, that's all. No biggie."

  "Okay. I guess… you'll handle… champagne, right?"

  "You're handling swats. And sweet talking him into the cuffs. I get to help tickling him. And I get champagne fun. Question."

  "Yeah?"

  "When do I get my… carrot."

  "Oh, that."

  "Yeah, that. I haven't heard any carrot talk yet."

  "Well, after that goes down? Yeah, you get carrots."

  "What… kind of carrot."

  "What do you mean, what kind of carrot. You get… his carrot."

  "And you watch me get his carrot, you said."

  "Yeah."

  "Aren't you getting… carrots? Only so many carrots, to go around. I have no idea how many reloads we get. Who gets which one."

  "I get carrots all the time. You could… have as many carrots as you can get out of his little feed bag."

  "Hmm."

  "What now…"

  "You got four basic carrot groups. Hand carrot, mouth carrot. Then twat carrot, and butt carrot. What do I get."

  "Which one do you want?"

  "Uh…"

  "I'm afraid to ask."

  "Around the world? All three holes. Now, the hand job? That's another one. So, other girls go around the world. I go around the world? Plus one. I want all four carrots."

  "That's… not a quick snack."

  "Oh. He's three pumps and a dump, takes a nap?"

  "Actually, no."

  "I take my time, enjoying my four course meal. Not sure what you're used to. If I have to wait, between carrots? I wait. Watch a movie. Time for talking. But, I don't leave until I get my four course meal in."

  "Jesus."

  "They usually talk to him, yeah."

  "You wanna rock his world, for a couple hours."

  "Look. A lot of girls? Go out to eat. Come home. Three pumps and the dump. Then? They hit a party. Maybe another hump after the party. Not how I roll."

  "You skip the date, skip the party…"

  "The date? The party? Fuck that. This, is about fucking. I go over there. I'm there to stay. I fuck them, for hours. Room mate comes home? He can listen through the wall. You know when I get in. Wee hours, or first light."

  "All night?"

  "All night. Look. You told me what you think the date's for. That? Is what the date's for, to me. I don't want bought pizza, I don't wanna hit the party. I don't want presents. I want that. When I finally leave? All tuckered out. My idea? He's had other girls before me. He'll have other girls after me. But, the nights he spends with me? I like to think, years down the road… the boys sit around, reminiscing. Yeah, well. There was this one… and that? Is me."

  "Okay. But not tonight. I'll… pn this a little."

  "Aw. Pooh. I thought I got a carrot tonight."

  "What carrot do you want?"

  "Hmm. I'm not trying to… show you up, or anything. You don't have to let me… around the world, plus one. I don't want you to think, I'm trying to…"

  "I only do… wet sloppy carrot."

  "You mean, I'm allowed to…"

  "Yeah."

  "I still have… blue clit."

  "Oh, okay. I'll have him… take care of that. Return the favor."

  "He any good at it?"

  "Guess you'll find out, won't you."

  "I guess I will. I'm getting my eggs the way I want them from now on. Cool."

  "What do you…"

  "Breakfast. You? Get your eggs, any way you want them. We all, get scrambled or we can make it ourselves. After I swallow him? I don't want money, I don't want dinner, I don't want presents, or anything. But… I bet after I'm done? I start getting my eggs, like I want. And… the other girls don't."

  "That's all you want?"

  She shrugged.

  "Its a moral victory. He's your boy. You get your eggs the way you want them, and no one else. I want my damn eggs. That's all."

  "Deal."

  "Hmm."

  "What else?"

  "Write this down. Not what else? First time I think I ever said… what less."

  "Meaning…"

  "As much as it… kind of pains me to say it? I was getting… excited, I guess… being good. Something new. I have to learn how to be good. Anticipation. Waiting. Can… I wait a little?"

  "Oh. You want to…"

  "I wanna savor it, a little. You made it sound so… good. Then? I looked over. Its a different… tingle. You rush this? I get carrots. You get… bad girl lessons. He gets, well, we know what he gets now. But… will you give me, good girl lessons?"

  "Yes, honey."

  "I can get fucked anytime I want, just about. If I hit a patch, new guys aren't looking good enough? I have a roster. You act like I can't call one up, or just stop over, and…"

  "They really missed you. I get it. You don't get turned down much, do you."

  "Not bragging, but."

  "You meant it when you said it, you wouldn't try to show me up. I mean, I didn't realize, I would have to sit there for… you're describing hours, and watch you rock his world. And that's a normal fuck for you, right?"

  "We take breaks. We need drinks of water. We have snacks. But my rule? You stay naked, until I get all mine out of you. I refuse to fuck a boy, if I don't like him. That's what I do for them. But, if I really like a guy?"

  "Oh Christ."

  "You heard me tell phone cunt. I wasn't just making that up, sure she thinks I am though. Around the world twice? Actually, that's around the word, plus one… then I start over again. Twice on every… carrot. It takes all weekend. Every carrot? Takes a little longer to get out of them."

  "Eight?"

  "Four, if I just like them. But yeah, eight if I really like them. So, when I call one back…"

  "They tend to pick up the phone, or text back."

  "Usually. Yeah."

  "You want… anticipation heightened?"

  "I mean, not a whole year or anything."

  "No. Nothing like that. Want to experience something new, I bet you never experienced before?"

  "Now. That? Would be a trick. I might have run out of cherries, sis."

  "Follow me…"

  We ambled back over to the drinks table. I sipped his drink. Mixer. No tang. I picked up the schnapps bottle, and dumped some in. Glug, glug, glug. Smiling. He started sipping. Anything I want, I get. I now had both in tow, and we went off to the side. I had Lightning roll a joint, a nice sized one. In the course of us passing it around, of course Light was giving shotguns with a little kiss…

  "New rule, you two."

  They both looked. I eyed him, smiling.

  "I'm revoking the no tongue rule. She wants tongue? My friend gets all the tongue she wants. I expect you to keep her happy. She was down in the dumps, and now look at her. Keep that smile on her face. Also?"

  I put one hand above his package, and one hand below it.

  "This? Is off limits. And…"

  I put one hand over her panties, and one just below it.

  "Off limits. But… if she wants to drag you off, and circle second base for an hour? Make her happy. Please. For me?"

  "Uh… okay."

  Me and her wandered off some a little bit ter.

  "Now. You can get him drunk. You can smoke him out. You can whisper all the sweet nothings you want, promise him three trips around the world. Work him all you want. Slow dancing, shake it for him. I don't care. I want you to see if you can get him to agree to it. You? Can't get into any trouble. He can't either. But, he doesn't know that."

  "Aw. You wanna test him. That's… not right."

  "Not a test. Not really, though it technically is, I suppose. But, he got a lecture about… Miss Moody giving him a show, and he didn't notice. He's under… orders I guess, he promised to run and tell me if anyone tries to… you know. Go on. My money says, you're going to get turned down. He doesn't have to tell me, he's allowed to just ignore it. But, just in case he ignores it and doesn't want you in trouble? Then you tell me. Let's see what you got, little sis. Let's see… the magic."

  "Nothing bad can happen…"

  "Nope. You ever been shut down before?"

  "Uh… do I think I can get any guy? No. Of course not. There's… 10 boys walking around, they have rich parents, they're tall, handsome, work out. Big university, so we have a few… extraordinarily over eligible bachelors. But… once I get the eye? A little talking? Means I'm over the tall girl thing. That's about it. Its a matter of how much charm I turn on."

  "I think you know. He already likes you. Looking at you, and more importantly? He actually respects you. Understands you some now. That about all you need?"

  "Liking to look? Is enough. The rest is just bonus ammunition."

  "Have fun."

  I smiled.

  "You're really sure of yourself."

  "I am. I think you're gonna get rejected, no matter what you try. Nothing will work. There's a method to my madness, if you wondered."

  "If its not testing, then what."

  "You. Your… mother. She taught you, that boys were for sex, boys were for money. Get both, get it all. Move onto the next one. Never give up the milk, without getting fair market value for it, how am I doing?"

  "She was the queen of gold diggers. Here, this isn't a joke. She has a little computer site, she pays a fee for?"

  "Yeah…"

  "Any guy she talks to. Click click click… knows what he's worth. He owns a business? Right there. Tax info, so they can't brag and lie. Car's a rental? She knows. Its disgusting. Boys? Are for money. The sex? Is just how to get it."

  "Honey? You have the most… skewed world view, that you could possibly get."

  "Its why I refuse to take dinner, presents, nothing. I just… like them. I prove it. Some other girl? Can steal all their shit. I just liked them. I prove it."

  "Well, this will prove to you? There's more to a real retionship, than just sex. Love is different than sex. Its part of it, a big part even. A huge part, but… there's more. Love, real love. It has… trust. Understanding. Acceptance. You feel secure, in knowing that no matter what else? There's that, waiting at home. Neither one of us, has any money the other wants, right? But its more than just sex. Go on. Prove me wrong. That's the big test, not testing him. You finding it out. Or? Prove me wrong."

  "Sounds like, who can run more ps. You're on."

  "Get those legs and tongue moving. Oh. By the way?"

  "Yeah?"

  "You? Are allowed to try to get your hand down his boxers. Or anything else you think you can get down there. Not gonna do you any good. But? Try away."